Category: Opinions

Sappy social media: The great #relationship debacle

KATRINA PUDUCAY
Staff Writer

#mancrushmadness
#MCM, #WCW, we see these hashtags all the time from that one friend who always has to show off what their boyfriend or girlfriend has gotten them, or just to show who their “man crush” or “woman crush” is on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram. We get it. Your boyfriend or girlfriend is your man crush (MCM) or woman crush (WCW) every single week. I am pretty sure nothing has changed. Does everyone really need to know the ins and outs of relationships besides their own? No.
Hashtags are everywhere. #soulmates #love #truelove #boyfriend #girlfriend, etc. It never stops. I do not mind a mushy relationship post every once in a while, but posting your significant other every week for crush days is old and played out. Even showing something nice from your significant other is not so bad. It just gets annoying when I see who your crush is every week. And if you want to be technical, they are already your significant other and you are far beyond the crush stages, so please cut it out.
Also, I understand that posting something about your significant other is just showing your happiness with them. However, I think there are better ways to show affection and appreciation, ways in which the entire world does not have to see.
I get that social media is open and people are free to post whatever they please. But why not think twice about the annoying aftereffects of what you post?

NAI MOORE
Staff Writer

#OMGdrama
“I’m so done with him,” “What kind of girlfriend gives my boy her number?” “Oh, OK so you mad, or nah?” These are all common sayings on Facebook and Twitter that I have seen constantly. It seems that no matter how good a relationship is, at some point there will be a fallout. However, must that fallout be all over the Internet?
I am so tired of seeing couples throw their significant others under the bus using social media. I actually find it kind of repulsive when I see information about significant others bashing each other on social media. It is absurdly annoying. The rest of the world could not care less about your relationship drama.
Sadly, if someone does care enough to read every single tweet posted or status updated, nine times out of ten, they are nosy and patiently waiting for you all to break up. In passing, I have heard plenty of people complaining about a guy or girl tweeting about their unfaithful boyfriend or girlfriend
It is funny because I normally see the person who is going through this type of situation with their friends, telling all of their business. Within the next two hours those same friends are with another group of people retelling the story and scrolling through Twitter and Facebook to rehash the whole thing.
How long will it take for an individual to learn that social media isn’t the place for relationship venting? There was a practice invented back in the olden days called communication. I would much rather the couples speak with one another about their issues and leave the entire world out of it.
Let’s talk about real friendship for a second. If friendships were as close as people pretend they are, people would actually look out for each other. There is no way I would see my best friend commit such a crime against herself and not say anything. Whether she agreed with what I was saying to her or not, she would have to listen to what I was saying.
There are many issues connecting to social media arguments that all string from the same places: immaturity, loss of communication, and lack of good friends.
My advice to everyone out there is to keep personal business personal. There is no need to broadcast all of your dirty laundry to the public.
Please, do all of America a favor and keep your relationship issues between your partner and yourself!

He Said She Said

Who is the drunk babysitter in the relationship?

HE:
This is not a question about gender; don’t be fooled by that. The issue of having to babysit lies in the personality of the intoxicated person, and they are separated into categories.
First there is the Weeper, who bawls their eyes out in every situation. They could drop their hot dog on the ground and scream to the sky about how much they miss it with tears streaming down their face. The only thing to do is buy them another hot dog. Or four.
The Fighter and the Jerk go hand in hand. There was a Fighter/Jerk drunk near me once at a party and somebody double-dipped into a bowl of guacamole. Long story short, fists were thrown and the guac was ruined. It took us days to make that guacamole.
The Lover is the type of drunk that does not stop, no matter what, with the cheek kissing and butt-grabbing, even in front of your parents or your boss. The lover loves love, and the alcohol makes them love too much.
There is also the prolific Anti-Gravity Person (AGP). The alcohol in their system has shut down their motor cortex. They will drop things, fall over, run into walls, break the priceless vases which everybody has in their dorms and be a general danger to themselves and others.
Last but not least by any means is the Vommer. The Vommer is a hybrid of the Weeper, who will cry and apologize constantly, as well as projectile vomit everywhere. The Vommer will vomit on you, on your couch and most likely on any pet that doesn’t move fast enough. Your entire night will be spent gently but firmly thrusting bread down their throat.
Everybody has their category, and who babysits is beside the point. Just be wary of their personality before popping the cork.

SHE:
One does not typically think of a long night of heavy drinking when girls’ night out is brought up. So, why is it that when men get together for a night out they are more likely to drink and ultimately wind up being babysat by their significant other?
Granted, when a woman gets drunk she has to be taken care of by her boyfriend, but my overall point is that men get hammered more often.
I am sure there is some random statistic out there in data land that proves this. I guarantee you, if you really pay attention to who is helping whom upstairs to the bathroom after a party, it is probably the girlfriend that is helping her man.
Well, you might be wondering “what about those stereotypical drunk girls you see on the sidewalk being loud and belligerent toward everything?” Those girls do not count. Nine times out of 10 they are single, which is why they are able to be that drunk in the first place.
When in a relationship, it is the guy who usually gets drunk with his friends more often than his girlfriend. Do I think that gender roles and biases play a huge role in this? Yes. Am I going to get deeper into that topic right now? No. That is a topic for another time. However, I will say this: in a relationship, a female is bound to babysit her significant other more times out of the year.
Why is this? Because it is more socially acceptable and normal for a man to be intoxicated than it is for a female. This double standard is well understood by both sexes, females in relationships do not get drunk as often as their male counterparts for the sake of their image. If it were up to me, people in relationships would stay in and get drunk together.

Food for thought

Undercover Dater

ELIZABETH SIMS
Social Media Editor

We have all thought about what online dating would be like. If you have not, you are lying to yourself. Be honest, those commercials look very intriguing. I mean, what if you meet “the one?” But we all also have an inherent fear of the unknown. What if we decide to meet the person we have been talking to online and they are not who they said they were? What if you decide to go home with this person, things get out of hand and you get hurt? Well, all of these things were going through my mind as I decided to go “undercover” to give those curious people the inside scoop of what it’s like to date online.
First off, I used an app on my phone, not a service on the computer. Those two things are very different. Usually, when you are doing online dating, you pay. You can set up an account for free, but to contact any of your matches, you have to pay a monthly fee, usually around $25 for a basic membership.
However, with almost every dating app I’ve seen, you pay nothing, but there is also no regulation. Online websites have moderators who make sure people aren’t trying to meet up as soon as they meet, as is often the case on an app.
The app I used is Tinder, because it links to your Facebook, letting you see their actual first name (not some sketchy username), as well as all of the shared interests you might have on Facebook. It let me find some things to talk about other than the weather and when I could meet for a beer, which is a question I got asked every time I met someone.
After going through around 200 hundred profiles, I finally decided to meet two men, Thomas and Nick. Both men portrayed themselves as very respectful, honest men who would never try anything on the first “date.” They wanted a relationship, not a one night stand. However, people are often very different in person than they try to appear on an app, Facebook, or through text. So, both of these men hoped for sex, neither being successful. And both of these men didn’t stay in contact with me after they realized they weren’t going to get any either.
Now, I’m not saying do not use the app, or any app or website, because I still have the app on my phone. Not to date, but because I like to meet people and hear their stories. However, there are some things to keep in mind if you do decide to date online.
1. Be smart. I cannot stress this enough. Not to scare people, but there might be serial killers, rapists and psychos on these sites. There are also “normal” folk, but you still need to keep your guard up for a while, at least until you have known them for some time.
2. If you plan to meet someone, do it in a public place for the first few dates. It is safer.
3. Tell a friend. My best girlfriends not only knew these guys were here, but made excuses to come see me in my room while ea guy was here, just to check up on things.
Now, I obviously cannot tell you how to live your life, but I can highly encourage you to use your brain when doing online or mobile dating. There is potential for some really sketchy people coming on to you, but there is also potential for meeting some genuinely great folks who make really good friends. It is up to you to sort through the crazies and find the good ones.

St. Patty’s Day unveiled

MICHAEL WILLSON
Staff Writer

Good old St. Patrick’s Day. The day of Irish music, drinking beer, and wearing green to avoid getting pinched. St. Patrick’s Day is one of the country’s most popular holidays, but does anyone know why we celebrate it?
Most Americans think St. Patrick’s Day is a day for getting drunk on green beer. If you asked around, I am sure most would say that St. Patrick himself is the leprechaun from the Lucky Charms commercials. This is exactly why I must shed some light on St. Patrick’s Day and explain the real reason why we celebrate it.
First of all, the only reason why St. Patrick’s Day is celebrated in the States is that there is a large number of descendants of Irish immigrants here. If you were to look at cities like Boston and New York, you would find that Irish-Americans make up about eleven to sixteen percent of the population, according to recent population statistics. They celebrate St. Patrick’s Day to show support and pride for their Irish heritage, while everyone else celebrates it because they think it looks fun. It has become quite popular for everyone to become “Irish for a day” every March 17.
Second of all, St. Patrick is a celebrated figure whom no one knows much about, not a 4-foot-11-inch man with a high-pitched voice and a box of cereal. People just know that he has a holiday, and that is all that they care about. If it were not for this holiday, St. Patrick would be a forgotten name.
Actually, St. Patrick was not even Irish. Isn’t that a shock? He was born in Scotland and lived in Britain during the time of the Roman Empire. When he was a teenager, he was captured by pirates and sold into slavery in Ireland. At the age of twenty, he escaped and returned to Britain, where he became a priest.
A few years later, St. Patrick returned to Ireland to share the Gospel with the Irish; they were not very welcoming. Patrick decided that the best way to convert the Irish was to use their culture. Patrick compared the three leaves of the shamrock to the Trinity: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. This was a much more successful approach. It is because of St. Patrick that the majority of Ireland is Roman Catholic.
I know at this point most of you may be thinking: “What? St. Patrick’s Day is a religious holiday?” Technically, yes, although most people will never think of it that way. St. Patrick’s Day will always be a misunderstood holiday, but we will enjoy it nevertheless.
I love a St. Patrick’s Day. Every March I crave a shamrock shake and a corned beef sandwich, and I appreciate the beautiful ocean of green clothing that appears. All of that comes with March 17. However, if we are going to “celebrate” a holiday that has absolutely nothing to do with us, we need to at least know what we are celebrating.

Just drink responsibly

DOUG HARDMAN
Opinions Editor

Shots, shots, shots! With St. Patty’s around the corner and Spring Break in the same step, it is time to party. But with good times and excessive drinking comes even greater responsibility. Regardless of what you may be doing, you are always responsible for your actions. Do not blame the booze; it was your sober choice to drink in the first place.
No one can tell you not to drink. It is a matter of free will and your willingness to make a fool of yourself. And drinking is primarily a social convention so you may not want to be the not-so-fun guy drinking water in the corner. There is nothing wrong with that, but you are going to have a bad time without the sweet liquid magic in your system.
And, of course, being a voice of the good people of Virginia Wesleyan, I cannot encourage or condone underage drinking amongst college students. However, if you are going to partake in partying illegally, I just ask that you do so responsibly and courteously. Especially since most of you will not be on campus and will be abroad, unleashing the beast in the dark, unforgiving alleyways of the world.
The biggest and most overused advice that actually means something is: DO NOT drink and drive. The cost of a taxi does not equal the cost of your life or anyone else’s.
You should be less worried about spending twenty bucks on getting home safely than arguing the fact that you are okay to drive when you are clearly not. And the last thing you want to be remembered for is being the drunk driver who killed an innocent woman and her baby.
They say one of the easiest ways to learn something is by repetition, so let me drill this into your head: if you are going to drink, drink responsibly. There is absolutely nothing wrong with partying or having a good time, as long as you know how to handle yourself.
There is a thing called moderation and I do not care if you can drink me under the table. Know your limit or you will end up making out with some engaged stranger and then hate yourself for weeks on end.
Let’s be honest: every college student is going to have their one crazy, drunken night in college that they will never live down. It happens. It is fun. But it is only fun if you wake up safely the next morning and not in some stranger’s bed or on the streets. Then you get to have a fun “Hangover” scavenger hunt to find your way back.
We are at the age between crazy teen and responsible adult. You can have the best of both. Ready for another drilling? Just be responsible.